literature

Ravenna up for Critique

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Literature Text

Is the character original or fandom based: Original

Name: Ravenna

Last name: Dever

Alias(Do they go by any other names?): no

Age: 16

Birth Date: May 27th

Species(Is he/she not human?): Wolf, Rabbit Hybrid

Race: Caucasian. Russian/French Heritage

Gender: Female

Sexuality: Straight

Blood Father: Servil Dever

Blood Mother: Surrogate: "name unknown at the moment"

Adoptive parents(Current or other): Stepfather: Harlan LeFèvre Adoptive parent: An elder woman "Name unknown at the moment"  Legal Guardian: Kezhon Dever Foster parents: Marcie and Gerald.

Siblings, if any: Older half-brothers: Kezhon and Ronnie Dever

Best friend(s): Angelina, Mu-lina, and Lia

Past Love Interests: none

Current Love Interest: Liam O'Leary

Main Enemy(ies): Snooty group of high school girls "names unknown for the moment"

Most Hated: It's high school, there is always that girl. "Name unknown"

Type of crime(Not a criminal? Skip this.): none

Hair Colour(s): Black with hot pink highlights dyed into it and some of the high lights are in her tail and tips of her ears.

Hair Texture: Wiry and soft.

Hair Length /Cut:  Cropped

Skin Tone(s): Pale

Extra Anatomy(Deformities or other?): Long ears that are a mix between a rabbit's and a wolf's. Short fluffy tail about 12 inches long and paws.

Body Type: Small and thin, still developing and small breasts.

Height: 5'3"

Weight: 118

Personality: Friendly for the most part, tends to be the more level headed one of her group of friends. She is nurturing and can be a little depressed . Becomes very stressed and frustrated in tense situations. Is highly curious sexuality wise and is a tad bit of a romantic and is dark humored.

Goals in life: She wants to become a multi-genre writer, and wants to meet more of her family.

(Skip this is schooling or jobs don't apply to your character)

Occupation/Job: none

Boss: none

Talents: Great speaker, very good writer/poet, reasonable cook.

Years of Education: 9-10

Level of Education(graduated from high school, college, extra university work, etc.):

Language(s) Spoken: Portuguese  and Russian

Supernatural Abilities( Have any?): Has the ability to shape shift like others of the world but is very stressful on the body.

Powers(They have any notable ones?):

Alternate Forms(Again, if this doesn't apply, skip it.): A wolf rabbit hybrid thing.

Weapon(s) of Choice: none

Pets/Special Animals: An African grey parrot and a hamster.

Scars/Deformities: none

Diseases/Conditions: Because of her odd genetic mix pregnancy takes a toll on her body, she may be fine for the first birth but any more could be fatal.

Medications: none

Addictions / Dependencies: none

Glasses/Contacts: none

Piercings: Eyebrows, ears, nose, lip and belly button is pierced.

Tattoos: none

Makeup: What ever goes best with her out fit. Primarily dark colors.

Jewelry: Always wears a gold heart locket, everything else is random.

Fashion Sense(Style of clothes): Gothic or alternative. Can be skimpy but not showy. In other words leaves some to the imagination.

Mental Age: In the 20s.

Mental Gender: female

Hobbies: Writes stories or journals about anything on her mind. She loves to go out to town with her friends. Reads.

Special/Significant Belongings:  A gold heart locket.

Voice: She has very good grammar and uses a high variety of words. Her voice is normally very calm. [kind of hard to explain.]

Quote: none

Psychiatric Problems: Goes through depression and can be very emotional in tough times.

Phobias: Being alone, severe lightening and thunder storms, the dark [the dark and storms only really bother her when she knows no one else is around]

Obsessions: Loves to read, Shakespeare and Edgar Allen Poe.

Sociability: Is friendly but prefers not to socialize very much with people she doesn't know to well.

Outlook: She has a rather positive outlook but it can rapidly change in times of crisis.

Tidiness: Reasonable, she'd have to be told to straighten up her room regularly though.

Cleanliness:  Is pretty clean.

Bravery: She can be brave when she needs to but will cave easily if things become too overwhelming.

Strength: Speedy runner and jumper, her strength is primarily in her legs.

Guilty pleasure: Loves her coffee black

Weaknesses: Caves easily under pressure, can make dumb decisions and behave impulsively at times.

Fears: She doesn't like to be alone and is constantly worried about her brother's mental well being, so she doesn't like it when he goes out alone and doesn't come back on time and worries about him being alone.

Does he/she die?: Almost, a lot of blood loss during child birth. Had to stay hospitalized for a while.

Past History(What makes them tick?): She was born from a surrogate mother who died while having her. When a huge war struck she was sent to live with her father's ex-wife for safety when she was still an infant. She doesn't remember anything from then but she does remember living with her brother and an old woman who had adopted them. After the elder woman died she was taken care of by her brother until he has a mental break down and was committed and was taken in by a foster family and lies with them until his release.
Another critique I did, this time for dear Ravenna. I open this up for anyone to voice their opinions if they would like.

Remember, be respectful, be helpful, and do not be tedious.

And ask questions, questions are your friend!
© 2012 - 2024 PoesRaven1990
Comments4
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LunarInsaNIty's avatar
I think this character is pretty neat. I like the idea of it. I would say is to include some details of this original story somewhere in the artist's description, since I had no clue where any of this was coming from. Also, I feel like the past history can be more detailed. How did all of these events affect her? How does her personality affect how she reacts to this? Was she "changed" because of the death of her caretaker and mental breakdown of her brother? Other than that, I'd say she looks pretty good.